No, it’s not because I am so neurotic that I think that you have all been talking about me. Speculating where I have been for the past two weeks. Wondering if maybe, just maybe, I’d had a baby. The answer to that, by the way, is “no.” The baby is still where he belongs, although I must admit that I would love to have this over with. In the past two weeks, two of my friends from church have had their babies and I am jealous. At least I’m next in line.
My absence from the blogging world has actually been due to my absence from most of life for the past two weeks. I have been sick. Not just a little sick. It started with my attempts to hack up a lung. That was two weeks ago. Friday and Saturday was just the hacking, so I was in total denial that I was really sick. After all, I am downing so many immunity boosters to try and beat my Strep B test next week that no germs would dare settle in now, right? Wrong. By Sunday I had no appetite. At my OB appointment that Tuesday, I had lost three pounds since the appointment two weeks before. By last Thursday, I was so completely lacking in energy that Sean’s grandmother came over Thursday and Friday to take care of the kids. I didn’t get off of the couch until this Monday, Tuesday was the first time I got back on my computer, and I didn’t leave the house until Wednesday. I have had coughing fits so horrible that they made me throw up. I have a section on the left side of my stomach that feels like it might rip open when I cough. In short, I have been miserable.
Many years ago, when my mother was quite ill, her bishop told her that she could take a shot of whiskey for her cough. Anyone who knows anything about Mormons knows that we don’t drink alcohol, so it seems like a strange recommendation coming from a church leader–I guess the idea was that it was for medicinal purposes (cough medicine tends to have quite a bit of alcohol in it, anyhow). Back then, my dad’s company would give him a bottle of Crown Royal every year for Christmas. Some of the bottles were given away, the rest sat in the kitchen cabinet for occasional use as cough syrup (I can hear those of you who do drink groaning at the thought). I could never bring myself to do it, but was told that there was something truly amazing about the effects of whiskey on a cough.
About a year or so ago, I got really sick. So sick that I finally broke down and walked next door to get the bottle of whiskey. Long gone was the Crown Royal bottle. It had been replaced by an old bottle of Wild Turkey that was in my grandfather’s house when he died. I only took one tablespoon of it. It burned like heck going down. But, oh, the relief. Yes, there truly is something magical about whiskey on a cough. The past week or so, I have been tortured by the thought of that Wild Turkey next door, knowing that I would have sought that relief again if not for my pregnancy. Anything, anything to take this hideous hacking away.
Yesterday, after listening to me hack and finding out just how long I had been sick, a chiropractor friend of mine recommended that I try what he takes for a cold–Teton Valley Pepper Juice. Sean picked it up at his office today, and I just took my first dose–two tablespoons mixed in 1/4 cup V8 juice. The feeling going down was much like that spoonful of whiskey. And each sip (which were spread out–you don’t down this stuff in one quick chug) made my ears burn. I figure that has got to be a good sign. Of course, you would expect something made of apple cider vinegar, habanero peppers, garlic, horseradish root, and ginger root to burn the snot out of you (quite literally, thank heavens). We’ll see how it does over the next few days, but at least I have hope.
On another topic…It is interesting to realize just how much blogging has become a part of my life. For instance, I have spoken to no one in my extended family today. But I found out the status of my sister’s adoption, the fact that my parents are apparently so confident that I won’t go into labor before my due date that they are going on vacation in another state until 3 days before I am due, the fact that my divorced brother apparently has some honey in Vegas that is coming to visit in a few weeks, and that my younger brother will be moving back to our state this summer after years of living out West. It all came from my mom’s blog. Yes, the mom who lives next door to me. For four years now, I have teased her about the fact that I have to come up with some reason to bribe her to walk across the yard to my house. Now, I am reduced to getting my family updates over the internet. Of course, pre-blogging, she just would have forgotten to tell me any of it, so I guess this is actually a step in the right direction. 😉