As I was getting ready for the day this morning (shortly after scrubbing the carpet because I was stupid enough to put carpet in the dining room and, you know, orange juice BELONGS on the floor), my oldest three boys came running to me.
“Mommy, Mommy! We’re making a band! Can we have tattoos? We can’t be a band without tattoos!”
I am, of course, glad to see that my children have developed a strong awareness of pop culture. So, being the stellar parent that I am, I reached on top of the refrigerator and pulled down the sheets of temporary tattoos kept for just such an emergency. Within minutes of application, they had also retrieved the sashes from their Superman curtains, which were being worn as bandanas. Noah informed me that Eli would be playing the drum solo.
Can I just say how completely my children crack me up? (Of course, I’ve noticed it a lot more since I started putting all of their funny little moments up on Twitter. I guess I didn’t pay as close of attention to how funny they were until I started writing it all down.) Honestly, though, how can you not laugh at three little boys with temporary tattoos, Superman sash bandanas, a toy drum and an acoustic guitar who are “rocking out”?
Since our car has a nifty line in feature that allows us to plug in our MP3 players, we spent a few hours this weekend listening to our favorite songs while travelling back and forth to a family member’s house. At one point, Sean and I got into a conversation about how wonderful technology is because we were able to expose our kids to the music we like without making them (and us) listen to all of the other crap on the radio. And really, how awesome is it that our kids can sing along to Tom Petty and Aerosmith? Or that Noah regularly asks to listen to Paradise City? Or that Wyatt asked us to play Bohemian Rhapsody a couple of times in a row because he liked the second half so much? Or that Caleb makes awesome “rockin’ out” faces while bobbing his head to the whole darn playlist? (I know, some of you are just shocked by this…) It is parenting nirvana (as opposed to Nirvana, which is not currently on the playlist but has some worthwhile offerings that the kids would probably enjoy…).
My kids are hilarious AND cool.
I spent an entire hour this morning confused as to why my internet wasn’t working. Wait, backup, let me clarify something. We don’t actually have an internet connection (shocked?). What we DO have is a rockin’ signal booster that allows us to surf off of my (next door) parents’ wireless connection. So, if something goes weird, I reboot the signal booster. Or reboot my laptop. Occasionally, I hold the laptop in the air with the side that I think gets the best reception pointing out the window towards said parents’ house (seriously, I’m that pathetic). If all else fails, I sacrifice a chicken and dance naked streaked in blood.
None of it was working this morning, and we had done all we could with school without an internet connection.
I finally broke down and called my dad.
“Can you reset your wireless for me? I can’t get on the internet.”
“Nope,” was his only reply.
Then it hit me. He was having some electrical work done. He couldn’t reset it because he didn’t have any power. Which was why I couldn’t log onto the internet. Duh.
So I did what any good homeschooling mother would do. I turned on the Science Channel and told them that today’s attendance hours would be brought to them by Junkyard Wars (hey, you learn about mechanics AND get handy environmental lessons about how cool it is to recycle stuff).
I suppose that I could have done things more like they would have encountered in public school. I could have written several lists of rules that would be different for each subject, or had them jump on the trampoline yelling “Go Team!” to replicate a pep rally. Goodness knows how much of my school time was occupied with things of that nature. And maybe it would have been more effective—after about 15 minutes, Noah was begging to do real school.
Maybe next time I’ll just pull out the Superman curtains and teach the boys to play air guitar for music credit. I don’t think I’ve exposed them to The Doors yet…