Kid Poops-a-Lot

*talking*

Oh. my. gosh.Becky, look at that butt.
That diaper’s big.
It looks like one of those diaper commercials.
Who understands those commercials?
They only talk to about poop because they can make a lot of money,ok?
I mean that butt!It’s just so big!
I can’t believe–it’s just so round!It’s just so out there!
I mean, *GROSS*
It’s full of crap!

*rap*

I like clean butts and I cannot lie.
You other mothers can’t deny
That when a kid walks in with diaper full of waste
And it hits you in your face
You go numb!
Ya’ gotta be all tough
Cuz you know that that diaper’s stuffed!
Deep in the jeans she’s wearin’
Is goo and I can’t stop swearin’.

Oh, baby, don’t wanna be near ya’
Or even hear  ya’.
My playgroup tried to warn me
’Cause that butt you got
Makes m-m-me so ornery!

Ooh, little Miss Smooth Skin
You say you wanna play with your friends?
Well ‘scuse me ‘scuse me
That diaper’s full of poopey!

I see her playin’
With that diaper swayin’
It’s wet, yet, that’s not the worst it can get.

I’m tired of magazines
Making diapers look all clean.
Take the average momma and tell her that
She’ll say you’re full of crap!

So mommas (yeah!) mommas (yeah!)
Your kiddo got a stinky butt? (Heck yeah!)
It’s time to change it, (change it), change it,(change it),
change that nasty butt!

Baby’s got crap!
(Gerber face with a barnyard booty!)
Baby’s got crap!

 

If that didn’t make any sense to you, you can look up Baby Got Back by Sir Mix-a-Lot on YouTube. But don’t watch the real video, because when MTV bans your video when it first comes out…um, yeah.

Anyhow, now it is out of my head and I can move on with my life.

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2 Comments

Filed under A Scary Look into My Mind, Just for Fun, Kids, Parenting

2 responses to “Kid Poops-a-Lot

  1. Bwwwwaaaaaa-haaaaaaa-haaaaaaaa!!!!! Where do you come up with this stuff?! Wait! Do I really want to know? ;>)

  2. LOVED this! I was singing it as I read it. Excellent.

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